This, whatever it is, is OK. Because it HAS to be. There isn’t a choice. Life is full of good and bad, up and down. Every beginning has an end. There is no room for stressing and worrying and being scared of reaching the inevitable end of that rope.

It is what it is, it can’t be anything else, no matter how badly you want it to be.

There is always something next, there will always be something to look forward to.

It’s bedtime for this nocturnal creature. I’m too tired to stay awake any longer.. I swear I’ll do something productive when I wake up. x_x

Hope it doesn’t lag too badly.

Update: No lag and especially for being free, it’s a pretty awesome game.

I see the future and it ain’t pretty. I met fate and she ain’t kind. I walked the streets of faith and hope completely blind, and I awoke.. all alone.

Well, today was fairly productive. Finished my admissions application and tomorrow I need to scan dad’s license and voter’s card for my residency affidavit, print everything out and take it over to Seminole State next week.

In the mean time, I need to practice up for the math section of the PERT test I’m gonna have to take. I reeallyy don’t want to be stuck in remedial math because if that happens, it will probably hold me up for a year like poor Melissa. x_x

Did exactly what I thought I would do and said fuck technical school. I didn’t end up putting in an application with Daytona State, though. I found a program I’m interested in at Seminole State, so I’m working on putting in an application with them.

I have everything mostly filled out, I just have to get my dad’s information for residency as a dependent student and then it’s done and I can get some further instruction.

I really need to start preparing for the placement test because as it is right now, my math is probably back to a really low point. After all, I did barely pass it for my GED test a couple months ago.. Either way, I won’t be starting school until Fall mostly likely, which is fine because I have some things I need to get worked out. We’ll see. Excited to get my life on track.

I filled out my FAFSA form and put in an application at Lake Tech, which I think I will actually opt out of before admission because there’s a drastic change in the wind. I might end up just going straight for my Associate’s at Daytona State so I can eventually DirectConnect over to UCF in Daytona Beach.. Not sure yet. Thinking about things and trying to figure out what would be best.

Going to Daytona State would be closer than driving back and forth to and from Lake Tech and honestly it will amount to more in the end..

I’m putting my pondering to bed, however, because it is literally my bed time. I’m so sleepy and I’ve been really pushing myself today. I even put in a couple job applications, which I feel are probably futile attempts more than anything, but I figure if I get lucky and some doors open up and something lands in my lap courtesy of Ellegua, I will be grateful that I at least tried to wedge my foot in the door.

Goodnight.